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When I was growing up, new clothes were reserved for special occasions.
We waited a full year to receive them at Christmas.
My parents bought the same cotton material in bulk to save money, and told the tailor to make our clothes a few inches bigger so we could grow into them over the year.
Those were simpler times when I believed we were just poor.
We didn’t need to curb our impulses because we weren’t swimming in abundance.
Now, we live in a ‘richer’ world, and life has become even more complicated.
In 6 minutes or less :
- The psychology of shopping.
- Shopping as a social sport.
- Exploitation.
- Take Back the power.
- How to beat impulsive buying.
The Psychology Of Shopping.
Our brains are naturally drawn to new things.
And it makes sense from an evolutionary perspective where noticing something new, like a lion behind us, was the difference between life and death.
Here’s what happens when we shop.
Seeing Something New: You’re scrolling on the screen, and your eyes catch a stylish new dress. “Ooh, that looks nice!” you think to yourself. The dress triggers your brain’s reward center, releasing a feel-good chemical called dopamine.
Desire Kicks In: Next, your brain starts to want that dress. And if the marketers have done a great job, you start to think about how owning it might make you feel more confident, stylish, or happy.
Justification: Your lovely brain starts to find reasons why buying the dress is a good idea. “I’ve worked hard recently,” or “I need a boost.” So, you convince yourself that you deserve this treat.
To Buy or Not to Buy: Now, part of your brain is urging you to buy the dress, while another part might be warning you about spending too much. Who will win? Immediate gratification or long-term goals?
Decision Time: If the desire and justifications outweigh the caution, you’ll likely decide to buy the dress. Success! Your brain releases more dopamine, making you feel happy and excited about your new purchase.
After the Purchase: Your brain’s reward pathways light up, giving you a satisfaction boost. And even more dopamine is released while you wait and look forward to receiving this new dress.
It Finally Arrives: You put it on and you could either be thrilled with it or . . .
Well, I don’t need to explain what “buyer’s remorse” feels like when the dress doesn’t meet your expectations.
We’ve all experienced it.
Shopping As A Social Sport.
In the UK, shopping is a national pastime, a perfectly normal way to spend a Saturday afternoon.
Going to the mall to try on lots of different outfits and bag a good deal, is already exciting.
But doing it with friends is even more exciting — after all, who else will lie and tell you that you look beautiful in the 7th dress you just tried?
From a very young age, we notice that women are mostly judged by their appearance, while men are mostly judged by their achievements.
This pushes us into the world of fashion, where our main goal is dressing to impress, usually others.
We buy clothes to show our class, wealth, culture, and of course, to make our enemies jealous.
And Social media has put this on steroids.
You scroll through your feed and all you see are images of perfectly curated outfits.
It isn’t just celebrities anymore; it’s your friends, your colleagues, even people you admire from afar.
The newest trends, the latest must-haves, and the endless comparisons of yourself to others leave you feeling like you are always a step behind.
You can’t decide whether to fit in or stand out but either way, you find yourself buying new clothes not just for the joy it gives you but because it feels like a necessity:
to keep up,
to belong,
to not fall behind in an unspoken race.
Meanwhile Brands Are Busy Counting Their Money.
They understand that we buy clothes based on emotion and then justify these purchases with logic; so, they exploit this mercilessly to increase their profits.
For them, it’s simple.
They sell us a dream; they tap into our desires to create marketing campaigns that make us believe we can definitely achieve this dream; they justify the price with the value they tell us they are providing, and then they give us free next-day delivery and free returns, decreasing the time, effort, and sacrifice needed to get their product.
Next week, I’ll complicate it even further by diving deeper into the marketing tactics and techniques that you should watch out for.
Take Back The Power.
You can escape the never-ending cycle of shopping for instant gratification, only to end up regretting it.
You can start buying clothes only to impress yourself, and maybe your dog.
I’ve walked this path myself and can honestly say it’s one of the best steps I’ve taken to reduce stress in my life.
Buying fewer things has opened my eyes to a better way of seeing the world.
It’s given me time, space, and money to enjoy the calm of living more with less, and finding happiness in the things that make me a better human, wife, mother, and entrepreneur.
You can do the same too.
How To Beat Impulsive Shopping.
Step 1: Identify Your Triggers.
It helps you avoid buying things unnecessarily.
And if you’re not sure about your triggers, you can start a journal and track every instance you feel like buying clothes and the reasons for it over a month.
Here are some common reasons for impulsive shopping.
Step 2: Question the Need
Before you by a new garment, ask yourself, “Do I need this, or do I want this?”
Is it going to fill a true gap in your wardrobe or are you just being guided by those triggers and urges you identified in step 1?
Step 3: Have a 48-Hour Rule
Wait 48 hours before buying anything you feel you ‘must’ have.
It gives you time to starve the impulse and cross over to the land of rational thinking.
Instead of buying immediately, add links to the items you wish to buy in a Word document and review it occasionally to decide what you truly need.
Why should your wishlist be on a Word document?
Because as soon as you add something to a wishlist on a shopping site, the cookie gods will track you, and you’ll start receiving notifications and discounts tempting you to buy what you don’t really need.
They’re doing everything they can to get you.
Step 4: Research
For clothes you still wish to buy after the delay, do your research on the quality.
You want clothes that will last long, so you can stop wasting time replacing them.
Step 5: Congratulations
You’ve either decided to buy something that you really need and will last, or you’ve saved yourself some precious money.
Use it to invest in meaningful experiences.
Spend time with your loved ones, get therapy, exercise, meditate, or find a new hobby that brings you joy.
Yes, this entire framework is just one long stalling tactic at every level.
Everybody eventually gives up when you stall, even your brain.
What did you think about today’s newsletter? Click reply to let me know!
And please forward this to your friends if you liked it. 😉
See you next week,
-Yosi
